... the invasion is continuing quietly as planned...
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Rosa the foxfinch
Fidel the faithful parrot
Ernesto the Crocoduck
POEMS AND OTHER PIECES, published under pseudonyms --- Send your offerings to THIS ADDRESS FOR CONSIDERATION --- zephotherstuff@gmail.com
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Ernesto the Crocoduck
20 comments:
Multi-millionare ecologist Zac Goldsmith exhibits the result of his pachyderm breeding program on the grounds of his stately home, Hypocrite Hall.
Said Goldsmith, "The old-style grey elephants had a huge carbon footprint. We're hoping to phase them out completely in favour of our new green elephants."
Asked to comment, naturalist Sir David Attenborough said, "I need a drink."
Goldsmith's octogenarian gardener, Ebenezer Mulch, was heard to mutter: "He'll never get anybody to clip 'em all after I'm gone. You've got keep 'em clipped, otherwise they can't see where they're going and then you get all sorts of trouble.."
While visiting his friend Lord Chumblemumble at his new mansion, Laconic Manor, Sir Barnaby Charnaby-Tarnaby-Ffinch Ffinch, Bart., a very heavy drinker for many years, is thought to have gone for a walk on the lawns in front of the mansion. An hour later he was found in the gun room with his head blown off by a shotgun. Police are not treating the death as suspicious.
In order to publicize the new Green initiative in Celesteville good King Babar, Queen Celeste and Alexander ate watercress for a month, it may have been a mistake
tried, and failed, to personalize (plagiarize/steal) this and couldn't so I'll just post it as is (the last resort; it's been a long day)
When I See An Elephant Fly
I seen a peanut stand
And heard a rubber band
I seen a needle that winked it's eye
But I been done seen about everything
When I see a elephant fly
I seen a front porch swing
Heard a diamond ring
I seen a polka dot railroad tie
But I been done seen 'bout everything
When I see a elephant fly
I saw a clothes horse he r'ar up and buck
And they tell me that a man made a vegetable truck
I didn't see that, I only heard
But just to be sociable I'll take your word
I heard a fireside chat
I saw a baseball bat
And I just laughed til I thought I'd die
But I been done seen 'bout everything
When I see a elephant fly
But I been done seen 'bout everything
When I see a elephant fly
(With the wind)
When I see a elephant fly
*realize it isn't the sublime Edward Hopper but at least it's not more Spongebob eh? clip's here
I love that, File!
Zeph, is there anywhere on the interweb we can go to see a list of the effelants' locations? Or better still, a map of the world with pins stuck in it to chart their progress?
You were lucky to get a photo. They are very privet animals.
tusk tusk M, leave it out
Just thinking outside the box, yew beech.
Damn, said Melchett. I thought I'd got the swan shape sorted. Now it's not just necks, it's trunks too.
The Irish rugby squad's summer training camp provides an opportunity to introduce the new front row.
My ears are gonna be cut slim and checked,
Maybe a touch of seersucker, with an open neck,
I ride a G S scooter - oh no, damn, I may be a style icon, but I'm an elephant - I need a Harley.
Just back from Katmandu, Jake Mulch, grandson of Lord Goldsmith's garderner, exhales deeply, opens the window to let the smoke out, gazes out onto the lawns, and turns on the stereo, full blast.
Munni, I think if we knew where the elephants all were they would have to kill us, but there are some more sightings in the Annexe.
PS I forgot to say, thanks to Mimi for finding this photograph.
I wonder, if we let those kind of vegetal elephants grow, what would be the result ?
No need to thank Zeph.
Nothing is real but the sea and the sand.
Paddleman, in the Tahitian climate they might turn into green mammoths!
Or "grammoths", as they are known in the Tuamotu...
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